Category: Food for Thought

זכרון ציפה תרצה – The Food for Thought Archives in blessed memory of Celia Rosenberg a”h

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Vayigash – The Solace of Crying

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A little after Yosef revealed himself to his brothers and spoke to them about telling their father that he was alive, the Torah states: “Then he fell upon his brother Binyamin’s neck and wept; and Binyamin wept upon his neck” (Breishis 45:14). The Medrish Rabba (Vayigash 93:12 [13 in some editions]) learns from this pasuk “That just as Yosef only appeased his brothers through crying, so to Hashem will only redeem the Jews through crying, as it says ‘With weeping they will come and through supplications I will bring them’” (Yirmiyahu 31:8)”

There is a concept called מעשה אבות סימן לבנים, the actions of the fathers is a sign about the children. The Maharz”u points out that this is even more true regarding Yosef,  for all Jews are referred to in Yosef’s name as mentioned at the end of Breishis Rabba 71:2. This is the connection between Yosef crying on Binyamin’s shoulder and the Jews crying by the Redemption. But what does one crying have to do with the other? (Click here for Hebrew text.)

The Etz Yosef in the name of the Radak as well as the Eshed Hanachalim answer that Yosef was crying tears of joy over becoming reacquainted with his brothers, and his brothers were relieved to recognize that he was overjoyed to see them. So too will be the Jewish crying by their redemption. The Eshed Hanachalim adds that this is an incredible depiction of how sometimes, through so much happiness, one comes to cry; because of the overwhelming feeling of emotion that comes from knowing the sorrow of one’s past and the joy of his future, which is why Yosef cried. So too when Jews contemplate the torture and suffering of their past and the redemption that they will be living through, they will come to cry out of joy.

However, the Yefeh Toar seems not to be saying that Yosef was crying tears of joy. He connects back to the medrish before, which points out that the pasuk mentions twice that Yosef cried on Benyamin’s shoulder. The medrish says that once was for the destruction of the First Beis HaMikdash and one was for the destruction of the Second Beis HaMikdash, which he saw through Ruach Hakodesh, Divine inspiration. He did this when crying on Benyamin’s shoulder, since both would be partially built on Binyamin’s portion of the Land of Israel. The Yefeh Toar goes on to say that for this reason the next medrish (which is our medrish) “now says another reason why crying is mentioned here, for it was a crying of appeasement since he saw they were still very disturbed in his presence, as Rashi on the chumash mentions.” (Click here for Hebrew text.)

It sounds like Yosef was not crying out of joy, because the Yefeh Toar juxtaposed this crying to the previous crying over the downfall of both Holy Temples. And the Yefeh Toar says Yosef saw that his brothers were still distraught, even after he revealed himself to them and told them to bring his father and the rest of the family down to Egypt to be with him. One might think then that the crying was just a way to relate to his brothers, and relating to them was their solace or appeasement. But if that’s the case, then it doesn’t correlate with the next part of the medrish, because it’s not that Hashem will be crying with the Jews by the Redemption but that the Jews themselves will be crying. It must be therefore that crying by itself gives a sense of comfort and solace to a person. Crying has a way of calming people and appeasing their feelings of sadness, anxiety and suffering. Even seeing other people cry over your plight has that effect, not only your own crying.

We see the power of crying whether tears of joy or tears of comfort it’s an appeasement and a solace which can change people’s lives and prepare them for their next stage in life.

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Miketz – The Role of a Leader


Yosef was appointed to the position of second in command of Egypt by Pharaoh, specifically to oversee food storage and distribution during the years of famine. As it states in this week’s Torah portion of Miketz, “Now Yosef, he was the viceroy over the land, he was the provider to all the people of the land” (Breishis 42:6).

The Pirkei DiRebbe Eliezer (perek 39 with the Be’ur Maspik) says that the angel Gavriel taught Yosef all the seventy languages of the world so when people of many languages came with their taxes and gifts to buy provisions, Yosef would speak to ever single person in their own language. For this reason, he was called The Translator. Some people came to buy provisions to stave off the starvation of their household, others came to buy food for themselves, and they would each ask the other how much they were sold the food for. So, when they came to Yosef, he would say that whatever amount you heard, that is the price, to ensure that he would not sell it for less. The Pirkei DiRebbe Eliezer concludes that from here we see that whoever sells merchandise for less than its market value will never find blessing. (Click here for Hebrew text.)

The Toaliyos HaRalbag learns from the above pasuk that one should not be lackadaisical in upholding what he was appointed to do, and to not leave what he was instructed and expected to observe up to someone else, simply  because of the high position and power he was given by the ruler. For if he does, then he will be delivering acts of evil in place of good. Rather, one should put in extra effort to fulfill what he was appointed to do, as much as possible. This means taking into consideration the right thing to do and acting in a manner in which you are not withholding any good that could be given. For this reason we see that Yosef, though he was the ruler over the entire country, decided to himself provide the provisions to each individual.  This was to ensured that what he was appointed to do would be fulfilled to the best of his ability in the best manner possible, and to guarantee that he didn’t let his control and power prevent him from observing his duties. (Click here for Hebrew text.)

Yosef was a highly talented individual, proficient in all languages, a dream interpreter, and a skilled and shrewd businessman. He understood economics quite well and knew exactly how to take care of both Egypt and the world during these years of great depression and famine. He had to have delegated jobs and responsibilities to people throughout the kingdom to build the storehouses and organize the collection of food in the years of plenty to ensure an ample amount of food for everyone during the famine. There would have been no choice but to delegate, because it is not a one-man job. But why did he put himself in the position of being the seller and cashier of all the goods, to deal with every single person, from  all walks of life, to provide them directly with their needs? Couldn’t he have hired a layman, maybe even a few interpreters, to do such a menial job? He could have just stayed in the palace and delegated authority to others, sitting around advising Pharaoh or discussing economic issues, within the comforts of royalty instead of standing behind the counter and shmuzing with the common folk. So why didn’t he?!

The answer the Ralbag gives is simple in that, that is not what he was hired to do, exactly. He was expected to take care of the country in the best way possible, and delegating responsibilities and sitting back in the palace would not have been putting his full efforts and potential into the position he was given. The Ralbag adds that it would be an act of evil not good to simply delegate. This sounds even worse than being an ingrate, (כפוי טוב), the opposite of being grateful (הכרת הטוב), because not being grateful is just not showing a feeling of gratitude. But in this case, completely delegating and not being actively involved would be proactively not acceptable and an act of not doing what is good for those who hired him. (Note: It’s debatable whether the ultimate authority, like a king or president, should be put on a much higher pedestal and stay on the side lines because of his high-level status. But that can be questioned to an extent as well, because we find all over Tanach where the king or leader of the people went out to war with the army, and personally led them in battle.)

What we see from here is that when a person is hired to be a leader he is expected to do everything he can to get the job done in the best possible way, and only delegate when needed. But if not needed, then he has to be ready and willing to do even the menial work with all his heart and energy.

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Vayeishev – Deeply Intelligent Belief System

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At the end of this week’s Torah portion of Vayeishev, Yosef finds himself in jail with the chamberlain of butchers and the chamberlain of drinks, and they each had dreams which Yosef interpreted.
The medrish, Breishis Rabba (88:4) says, “‘And He placed them in the ward… the chamberlain of butchers appointed etc. [Yosef to be with them] the two of them dreamt a dream etc. [Each one according to the interpretation of his dream’ (Breishis 40:3-5). Rebbe Chiya bar Abba said each one dreamed a dream of his own as well as the interpretation of his companion’s dream. ‘Yosef came to them etc. They said to him, we dreamt a dream etc. [So, Yosef said to them,] Don’t interpretations belong to G-D’ (Breishis 40:6-8)? Yosef attributed the greatness to its rightful holder.” The Yefeh Toar explains what it means that Yosef attributed the greatness to its rightful holder, “You shouldn’t interpret this to mean [that Yosef was saying] G-D will interpret the dream, because if that was the case then what would have been the point in him listening to their dreams rather what he meant is that Hashem gave him the wisdom to interpret them, and that’s how he attributed greatness to its rightful holder.” (Click here for Hebrew text.)
The medrish is saying that Yosef was giving a lesson to the chamberlains of belief in Hashem. That ultimately He’s the one that provides the dreams, and the solution and interpretation of the dreams is also from Hashem. However, the Yefeh Toar points out that Yosef wasn’t telling them that Hashem would directly tell them their interpretations; rather, Hashem would give Yosef the wisdom to interpret their dreams.

What exactly is going on? The medrish in fact said that each one of them dreamt the other’s interpretation and they either misunderstood or wanted to double check. Either way, Hashem had in fact already given the interpretations; and if Yosef meant that they would remember and recognize the interpretations as things played out with them, who says that was in fact true? They might have totally missed Hashem’s message! It is also a highly unlikely possibility that Hashem would actually speak to these Egyptians directly. So one would think that it is obvious that Yosef was Hashem’s messenger to interpret the dreams, and that is in fact all Yosef might have meant, that Hashem will tell you the interpretations. So what does the Yefeh Toar mean when he says that Yosef wasn’t telling them that G-D would give them the solutions, for by telling them through Yosef Hashem actually did do so? That’s how Hashem works most of the time; He runs every aspect of the world by Himself but through the use of messengers. Be it nature, be it human beings, angels, wildlife etc., in order to get things done in a more discreet and modest fashion. This is in order to ensure free choice for human beings, and it’s also basic honor and respect for a king, especially The King Of All Kings, for existence to run in this fashion. If so, then isn’t it obvious and really the same thing if Yosef would have told them that Hashem would provide the interpretations to their dreams instead of attributing Hashem with giving him the knowledge to interpret their dreams?

The Yefeh Toar must therefore be teaching us how to strengthen our emuna  and bitachon, belief and trust in Hashem. We shouldn’t just attribute everything to Hashem in a generalized manner, but we should pinpoint our recognition of Hashem’s “hands” in our lives. As the Yefeh Toar points out, that Yosef told them that it wass because Hashem granted him wisdom to interpret the dreams, and that is why He should be credited; not just because all interpretations come from Hashem. By pinpointing and specifying in as much detail as possible, we can then fully acknowledge and strengthen our relationship with Hashem, His existence and our trust in Him.

Good Shabbos and Happy Chanukah starting Sunday night,
Rabbi Dovid Shmuel Milder

P.S. An interesting tidbit: In the Haftorah this week we read “אם יתקע שופר בעיר” and
we only read this in years when we blow shofar on both days of Rosh Hashana. When Rosh Hashana falls on Shabbos, then parshas Vayeishev is on Chanukah.

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Vayishlach -The Proper Perspective of Why to do the Right Thing

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The Sefer HaChinuch is known for giving reasons for the 613 mitvos, which is called טעמי המצוות. Seemingly, the reason to give reasons behind the mitzvos is as a הכרח, a motivation to ensure performance of the mitzvos.

There is one mitzva in this week’s Torah portion of Vayishlach, the third mitzva of the Torah, which is to not eat the גיד הנשה, the tendon of an animal’s thigh. As the Torah states, “Therefore Children of Israel are not to eat the displaced sinew on the hip-socket to this day, because he struck Yaakov’s hip-socket on the displaced sinew” (Breishis 32:33). The Sefer HaChinuch states, “When the Torah says “they shouldn’t eat it” this wasn’t said as a story, meaning parenthetically because this happened to the father then the children shouldn’t eat from that sinew, rather it is a warning from The Blessed Hashem that they shouldn’t eat it. The roots of this mitzvah are in order for there to be a hint to the Jews, that even though they have to deal with great sufferings at the hands of the gentiles in all the exiles, and specifically by the hands of the descendants of Eisav, but still they should have trust that they will never be wiped out. Rather their children and name will always rise up, and there will be their redemption from the hands of the enemy. And through constantly remembering this matter through this mitzvah being used as a reminder, then their faith and righteousness will be everlasting. This hint is based on the fact that this angel that fought with Yaakov Avinu, which tradition says was the ministering angel of Eisav, wanted to uproot Yaakov and his children from this world but he wasn’t able to. However, he hurt him with a blow to the thigh. So, to the descendants of Eisav have pained the descendants of Yaakov, and in the end you will have salvation from them. Just as we find by the father [Yaakov] when the sun rose he was healed and saved from the suffering, so to the sun of Moshiach shall rise for us and heal us from our suffering and our exile, amen, speedily in our days.” (Click here for Hebrew text.)
The Sefer HaChinuch first tells us to fulfill this mitzvah of not eating the gid hanasheh because Hashem commanded us not to, and not because we have a mesora, tradition, from our forefather, Yaakov to not eat it. But then the Sefer HaChinuch gives a reason why we should observe this mitzva, as a hint to strengthen our belief and trust in Hashem, that He will eventually end our suffering and redeem us from exile, as He promised never to wipe us out.

Why isn’t just the fact that Yaakov, one of our forefathers, refrained from eating the gid hanashe because of a specific incident that happened to him, enough of a reason for his descendants to  follow suit and keep this mitzvah? A tradition is a tradition. Chaza”l speak very highly of the concept of mesora, keeping and abiding by the link chain of our tradition from generation to generation. It is what binds the Torah together and ensures it’s continuity. If such a righteous and holy man as one of our forefathers, a progenitor of the Jewish People, had a tradition to not eat something, wouldn’t that be a noble enough reason to fulfill that mitzvah? Yet the Sefer HaChinuch says we should fulfill the mitzvah because Hashem said to, and not because of what our forefather did. What then is the point of giving a reason for observing this mitzva in the next paragraph that talks about the roots of the mitzva?

It must be that even the Sefer HaChinuch holds that ultimately the main intent when observing mitzvos must be because Hashem commanded and warned us to do so. Yet the Sefer HaChinuch felt he had to provide reasons behind the mitzvah, as a means to strengthen our emunah and bitachon in adhering to that mitzvah, for the sake of doing Hashem’s will. Therefore, any reasons given for why to fulfill the mitzva must be only to reenforce the belief that Hashem commanded us to keep this mitzva; and for no other reason should any mitzva be observed.

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Vayeitzei – Pesach Seder Dvar Torah in Parshas Vayeitzei

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We read in the Haggada of Pesach each year at the seder about an allusion to the covenant made by Hashem with Avraham at the Bris Bein Habesarim: “It is this that has stood by our fathers and us. For not only one has risen against us to annihilate us, but in every generation they rise up against us to annihilate us. But the Holy One, Blessed is He, rescues us from their hands.” The next paragraph in the Haggadah is an example of how in each generation someone tries to annihilate us but haven’t   succeeded: “Go and learn what Lavan the Aramean attempted to do to our father Yaakov! For Pharaoh decreed only against the males, but Lavan attempted to uproot everything as it says (Devarim 26:5) ‘An Aramean attempted to destroy my father. Then he descended to Egypt and sojourned there, with few people; and there he became a nation, great, mighty and numerous.'” This episode originates from the end of this week’s Torah portion of Vayeitzei, where Lavan ran after Yaakov and his family after they escaped Lavan’s house.
The Abarbanel on the Hagadda remarks on these two paragraphs, about the promise that was made to Avraham by Hashem at the bris bein habesarim that he would be exiled and persecuted, but ultimately go out as a mighty and wealthy nation. This occurred not only in Egypt but can happen again,  in each generation; and the proof is that it happened by Lavan. Yaakov worked very hard for his father-in-law Lavan and after twenty years he ran away with his family back to Eretz Canaan, with great wealth and a large amount of flock.
Lavan didn’t proactively do anything wrong to him but go out and learn from his words what Lavan’s intent was against Yaakov. Lavan admitted and said, “It is in my power to do you all harm” (Breishis 31:29). Lavan wanted to wipe them out, to smite each mother with her children and he said to Yaakov, “The daughters are my daughters, the children are my children and the flock is my flock, and all that you see is mine” (Breishis 31:43). Meaning, everything I deserve to have and to do whatever I want with them; but Hashem stopped me as the end of pasuk 29, quoted earlier states, “But the G-D of your father addressed me last night (in a dream) saying, ‘Beware of speaking with Yaakov either good or bad.'” Abarbanel goes on to say that the author of the Haggada is saying that the promise made to Avraham at the bris bein habesarim was fulfilled through Yaakov with Lavan, for Hashem judged Lavan, as it says, “But G-D had come to Lavan in a dream by night and said to him, ‘Beware lest…'” (Breishis 31:24). Yaakov left with great wealth as it had said earlier, “The man (referring to Yaakov) became exceedingly prosperous and he attained flocks, maidservants and servants, camels and donkeys” (Breishis 30:43). Abarbanel concludes: “And just as the promise of the bris bein habesarim was fulfilled for them so shall it be fulfilled for all our troubles in each generation!”

The Avudraham on the paragraph about Lavan in the Haggada says we know that Lavan wanted to wipe out Yaakov and his family because the Aramaic translation of the pasuk ארמי אבד אבי (Devarim 26:5), written by Onkelus, stated, “An Aramean wanted to decimate your father.” This is based on the fact that when Lavan the Aramean ran after Yaakov and reached him, he said to him, “It is in my power to do you all harm.” And because he thought about doing bad, Hashem considered it as if it was done. This is because Hashem considers the bad thoughts of gentiles as if they happened; and the only reason why they aren’t fulfilled is because Hashem annuls their evil ideas and doesn’t allow them to happen. (Click here for Hebrew text.)
The Avudraham is teaching us a very interesting psychological concept. Every human has free choice, including gentiles; yet the Avudraham claims that the sinister ideas of gentiles they will undoubtedly fulfill, and never change their mind out of remorse,  Hashem will at times stop them from bringing them to fruition. Why is it assumed that all gentiles won’t have remorse for their evil ideas and decide on their own not to do them? Even though Lavan said he could harm them, he didn’t because Hashem told him not to. But wasn’t that still his choice to listen to Hashem!? We see that Bilaam did not listen to Hashem and continued cursing the Jews; so Hashem put into his mouth blessings. But Lavan seemed to have chosen of his own free will to listen to Hashem; so why does the Avudraham and the haggada not give him the credit for making the right decision?

However it must be that in fact Lavan really wanted to kill Yaakov and his family, and that desire never changed; and only because Hashem restrained him and convinced him in his mind to not do it was it not fulfilled. That is why Hashem considered Lavan’s idea as if it came to fruition, ashet would have done if not for Hashem’s intervention. So too, all evil and sinister ideas of the gentiles we can assume are plots that they never plan to change and the only reason why they aren’t successful is because Hashem stops them.

That’s the psychology of wicked gentiles; once they come up with an evil plan they stick to it and don’t want to change. But ultimately Hashem runs the world and their sinister plots are thwarted.

Good Shabbos,
Rabbi Dovid Shmuel Milder
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Toldos – The Embarrassment of Being Yelled At

This Dvar Torah is dedicated in memory of Binah Kasirer a”h, Binah bas Shlomo, may her neshama have an aliyah and may her family be comforted amongst the mourners of Zion.

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The Ramban in this week’s Torah portion of Toldos (27:4) relates that Rivka knew through prophecy (See Breishis 25:23) when Hashem told her, “The elder shall serve the younger” that part of it meant that the younger, Yaakov, would be receiving the blessings over the older, Eisav. She didn’t tell this prophesy to Yitzchak, her husband, for three possible reasons, enumerated in the Ramban there. (Click here and here for Hebrew texts.)

When Rivka called Yaakov over to tell him the plan of how he would be disguised as Eisav to receive the blessings, the Torah records, “Now Rivka was listening as Yitzchak spoke to Eisav his son; and Eisav went to the field to hunt game to bring. But Rivka had said to Yaakov her son, saying, ‘Behold I heard your father speaking to you brother Eisav saying, bring me some game and make delicacies to eat and I will bless you in the presence of Hashem before my death'” (Breishis 27:5-7). The Ramban points out there that Yitzchak in fact did not tell Eisav that when he would give the blessings it would be ‘in the presence of Hashem.’ But the Ramban says that Rivka told Yaakov that she knew the blessings would be given by Yitzchak with Divine Inspiration, Ruach Hakodesh. Yaakov followed all the instructions his mother gave him and he successfully received the blessings as was Divinely intended.

 Yet at the end of the parsha it states, “When Rivka was told of the words of her older son, Esav, she sent and summoned Yaakov her younger son and said to him, ‘Behold, your brother Esav is consoling himself regarding you to kill you.'” (Breishis 27:42). The Ramban explains the reason why Rivka had to, “‘send word and summon Yaakov’ is that Yaakov was in a different place, not in the tent of his father and mother because he was hiding from Eisav his brother who was screaming at him. And Yaakov was either embarrassed from him or afraid.” (Click here for Hebrew text.)

It makes sense that Yaakov might have been afraid and gone into hiding because, although undoubtedly he was a tremendous baal bitachon, whole heartedly trusted in Hashem; but one can’t rely on miracles and make oneself a target in the open. However, why would he go into hiding out of embarrassment? He did the right thing and the pasuk in Mishley (1:8) says, “Hear my child the discipline of your father and do not forsake the teaching of your mother.” The Ibn Ezra there says that the wise mother teaches her son how to go on the straight path. The Metzudas Dovid says you should listen to the teachings of your mother. And the Peirush HaRid says that your mother or father would only teach you good, to learn and strengthen yourself in fear of Hashem and fulfilling his mitzvos. If this is the case, then Yaakov, one of the patriarchs, surely was fulfilling a mitzvah of kibud eim, respecting his mother, Rivka, one of the matriarchs, by listening to her instructions so he should not have been embarrassed for the deeds he partook in! So why would he hide out of embarrassment?

However, the Ramban says that Yaakov hid because he was screamed at by Eisav, who was complaining bitterly about him. We see from here that it is totally natural for a person, even Yaakov Avinu, at whatever level of embarrassment it was, to feel embarrassed after being yelled at. It’s only human nature, and being screamed at affected him to such a degree that he felt he had to go into hiding out of embarrassment.

We have to be very careful and sensitive to this fact, that when we get angry or frustrated and want to scream at the person who has angered or frustrated us, realize it will most likely embarrass that person. Is that worth it, or do we want to have on our head the fact that we made this person feel so bad? This might even be a trick to calming one’s anger and frustrations.

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Chayei Sarah – Making a Scene

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When a person feels successful and accomplished,  their reactions vary from person to person. On one end of the spectrum we see people who ‘pump fists and beat chests with a jig,’ priding themselves on how good they are. On the other end we find people humbly thanking Hashem inwardly for the success He granted them. In this week’s Torah portion of Chaye Sarah we find the proper response in these types of situations.

Avraham sent Eliezer, his trusted servant, off to Aram Naharaim, Avraham’s homeland, to find a wife for Yitzchak. When Eliezer found Rivka at the well and sensed that she was the one, the Torah records his reaction: “So the man bowed low and prostrated himself to Hashem. He said, Blessed is Hashem, G-D of my master Avraham, Who has not withheld His kindness and truth from my master. As for me, Hashem has guided me on the way to the house of my master’s brothers” (Breishis 24:26, 27).

The lesson the Ralbag learns from here is, “It’s proper for a person whose thoughts are properly intended and has success in his matters to acknowledge and give thanks to Hashem, for everything is from Him. For this can be utilized to align one’s love for Hashem and to come close to Him as much as possible. Meaning, when it’s publicized that Hashem takes care of mankind, in this way people will put in effort to serve Hashem and come close to Him as much as possible so that they can receive good from Him through His personal care and involvement with them. This is why Eliezer gave praise and gratitude to Hashem for the good that was granted to Avraham in this matter.” (Click here for Hebrew text.)
When one lands a good business deal or even aces a test or scores the winning point in a ballgame, it’s basic emuna and bitachon, belief and trust in Hashem that one shouldn’t take the credit themselves for the success they had. Yet, one might think, why make a scene? Just thank Hashem quietly, privately, even in one’s heart. There is no need to flaunt Hashem’s Divine intervention in their life. The humble thing to do would be to keep it to oneself and not have a public reaction that might draw attention. But we see from this Ralbag that Eliezer acted appropriately. He did a kida, which is full-fledged prostration with his whole body, spread on the floor, and bowed again towards Hashem, all in public, for the help he acknowledged Hashem provided in finding Yitzchak’s bashert, his proper soul mate. He made a scene, and the Ralbag says this was proper to do, because it can create an incredible kiddush Hashem.

The times when things are going your way and you feel successful, those are the easiest times to get close to Hashem. It’s easier to love and draw near to Hashem when you can feel He is personally helping, than in the hard times or even the mundane hidden times. Therefore take advantage and show it off to others (of course there are limits, you shouldn’t overdo it).  The litmus test is when you can honestly say that your response is lishem Shamayim, reacting so excitedly purely for the sake of Heaven; then you know you aren’t going overboard.

The Ralbag is teaching us that by showing your excitement and not keeping it inside, one can make a very positive impact on others and will drive them to seek out their own relationship with Hashem and see how He’s positively involved in their lives. This is a tremendous kiddush Hashem, because it’s drawing others closer to Hashem and causing them to love Him more and more. It also creates an opportunity to enhance ones own love and closeness towards Hashem because when you bring people closer to Hashem, Hashem will come even closer to you. The enhancement of love is mutual.

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Vayera –

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Zrizus: A Push to Stay on Target and Focused

Zrizus, zeal and speed but with alacrity, is usually identified as a prerequisite for performing mitzvos. As the famous Chaza”l says: זריזין מקדימין למצוות. However, we find in this week’s Torah portion of Vayeira that Avraham Avinu uses this attribute in an additional way, to ensure that the mitzva even gets done. The Torah states, “Avraham circumcised his son Yitzchak at the age of eight days as G-D had commanded him. And Avraham was a hundred years old when his son Yitzchak was born to him… So, Avraham awoke early in the morning, took bread and a skin of water and gave them to Hagar. He placed them on her shoulder along with the boy and sent her off” (Breishis 21: 4, 5, & 14).

The Ralbag learns from these pesukim that “it’s proper for a person to have alacrity to perform the mitzvos of Hashem, and not have anything stop him. Also do not forget mitzvos of Hashem because of one’s joy from being graced with good, but one should place the mitzvos of Hashem opposite his eyes constantly. For we see that Avraham Avinu acted with alacrity to fulfill the mitzvos of Hashem and thereby circumcised Yitzchak his son at the age of 8 days just as he was commanded. Even though he was a son of his old age he didn’t find any threat of loss for doing thing. He also didn’t forget the mitzvos of Hashem through so much joy he felt because of the grace bestowed upon him by Hashem for having a son from Sarah at such an old age for him and her. He even stop caring for his son Yishmael and threw him out of his house as Hashem commanded him.” (Click here for Hebrew text.)
Avraham used the attribute of zrizus, alacrity, to ensure he performed mitzvos and the will of Hashem quickly and with zeal. As we see from the fact that he got up early to listen to his wife Sarah’s advice, which Hashem commanded him to do, and banished from his home Hagar and Yishmael, who were harassing Yitzchak. He also used this attribute to ensure he circumcised his son Yitzchak at the proper time of eight days old, as Hashem had commanded him,  this zeal helped motivate him to fulfill the mitzva completely and in its entirety.

What is mindboggling is that the Ralbag notes that Avraham needed this attribute of zrizus as a motivation to perform Hashem’s mitzvos, against the joy he received from the fact that Hashem graced him with a child at such an old age. Wouldn’t that feeling of joy, which definitely enlisted feeling of hakaras hatov [gratitude] be a motivating factor to perform the mitzvos of Hashem? Rather than to do the opposite, of hindering the performance of fulfilling the will of Hashem?

We must say that the emotions of joy and excitement can overpower a person to the extent that it disrupts his focus in doing the will of Hashem. Albeit for Avraham Avinu, one who was so close to Hashem, especially at that point in his life, at one hundred years old, we can safely assume that he would have done Hashem’s will of giving a bris. But he may not have done so b’shleimus, with all the complete and proper intent, if not for the fact of the reinforcement of zrizus. What we see is that emotions can disrupt a person’s focus, even if the emotions are directed to Hashem. And using the attribute of zrizus, alacrity, one can refocus his mind on ensuring he fulfills the mitzvos and the will of Hashem properly in all its entirety, in the best way he possibly can.

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Lech Lecha -Shemiras Eiynayim: A Trick On How To Guard One’s Eyes

In this week’s Torah portion of Lech Lecha, the Torah relates that Avraham had to go down to Egypt because there was a famine in the land of Canaan: “And it occurred, as he was about to enter Egypt, he said to his wife Sarai, ‘See now, I have known that you are a woman of beautiful appearance…'” (Breishis 12:11).

Rabbeinu Bachye explains this pasuk “according to the medrish, when it says ‘See now, I have known that you are a woman of beautiful appearance,’ Avraham said to her that normally the travails of traveling depreciates beauty and removes the shine from the face, but you still stand in your beauty, behold I now know you are a woman of beautiful complexion. Chaza”l understood that he had never gazed at her until now. This is because Avraham, out of his great humility, made a covenant with his eyes, just as Iyov said, ‘I had made a pact with my eyes’ (Iyov 31:1). This is because righteous people make covenants with their limbs that they will not damage them just like a person making a peace treaty with his enemies, to not hurt them. Similarly, it writes, ‘You shall not seal a covenant with them and their gods’ (Shemos 23:32). For there is no worse enemy that harms a person then one’s own mis actions….'” (Click here for Hebrew text.)
Avraham Avinu was known to have complete control over his senses. Normally one sees whatever is in front of him. A person would have to turn his head or turn away to not look at something, but Avraham was on a level that he had the sense to not look at things he shouldn’t be looking at. The  Rabbeinu Bachye says that is because Avraham didn’t want to harm his body in any way by doing anything which might be inappropriate. This held true for all of his senses; he was able to control his sense of smell and hearing just like he was able to turn on and off his sense of sight. Even though this goes against human nature, as senses are automatically flooded with things around them. But Avraham worked on himself and made a pact with his body to ensure that he safeguarded himself from anything that might harm him spiritually or physically, just like a nation might make a peace treaty with their enemy to stop hurting each other. His guarding of his eyes from mundane, physical things was so complete and he was on such an unusually high level that he  had never even gazed at his own wife until that point. But when he saw that her face beautifully shinning, even after a long journey, he knew that she was always a very beautiful lady.

 What is interesting to note is that the motivation for his drive to safeguard his eyes from inappropriate gazing was based on his great humility. But wouldn’t it have made more sense for it to have been based on watchfulness (זהירות), which is the middah of not giving in one’s physical desires? Or perhaps even the middah of strength of willpower, as the first mishna in the fourth perek of Pirkei Avos says, “Who is mighty? He who subdues his personal inclination, as it says ‘He who is slow to anger is better than the strong man, and a master of his passions is better than a conqueror of a city” (Mishley 16:32). If that is truly the case, then what does this have to do with humility?

It would seem that Avraham Avinu was indeed using his character trait of immense humility as a motivator to take care of his senses and body. Just like a person who has been in battle with his enemies in a seemingly endless war, one still has to humble and restrain himself from hurting that enemy once he signs a peace agreement or treaty. So too Avraham used his trait of humility to encourage and motivate himself to be extra careful to care for his eyesight and other parts of his body, to not hurt them spiritually or physically in any way. Even though he, as a person, was in charge of himself and could choose to do whatever he wanted with his body, out of humility he realized it would not be right to harm his body. Therefore he made a pact or covenant with his senses and limbs to not harm them. He worked so hard to uphold that covenant to the point that he reached great heights of self-discipline, to the point that he was able to control and turn on and off his senses at appropriate times.

We see how the trait of humility can be used as a motivational force to do the right thing.

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Noach – The Ultimate Test: Proper Precision


There are many Jews who, even if they aren’t so adhering to Torah observance, still have some level standard of kashrus; at the very least they will not eat pig or shellfish. They understand that Hashem made these foods off-limits and can accept that. For whatever reason they are off-limits and considered spiritually defiling and abhorrent. In fact, they are only spiritually abhorrent, as Chaza”l say that it’s perfectly acceptable for a person to say ‘I would love to have bacon cheeseburger or shrimp cocktail, but what can I do, Hashem says it’s forbidden, and I must listen to Hashem.’ This attitude, that I must abstain from these foods because this is Hashem’s will, is a very positive attitude.

 However, there are some things which one would think can be much more deteriorating to one’s character and abhorrent to one’s spiritual demeanor but is still permissible and sometimes even a mitzva to partake in. Why would Hashem allow it? In this week’s Torah portion of Noach (Breishis 9:20-28) we find the absolutely humiliating and debilitating episode of Noach getting drunk after he left the Ark. He did this initially with very positive intent, giving wine libations to Hashem, but which ended with Cham and Canaan and their progeny cursed for all of history.

The Ralbag learns from this episode that it is appropriate to distance oneself from drinking wine more than the letter of the law, because the results can be degradation, and the loss can be unimaginable. For we see that Noach, who had a much-perfected demeanor, stumbled in this. This also holds true for anything that gets you intoxicated, for example milk and the like. (Click here for Hebrew text.)


 It would seem that even milk has properties that could lead a person to some sort of drunken state, if consumed in excess. I know my rebbe, Rav Avrahom Kanarek ztk”l, use to drink warm milk before he gave shiur and he told me it was because it calmed him. In any event, all the more so hard liquor; one has to be extremely careful about and distance oneself according to this.

Yet we find that the Orchos Tzadikim (Gate of Joy) goes to great lengths describing not only the cons but also the pros of drinking alcohol. “There is another kind of confusing joy which beclouds all of the mitzvos and causes fear of Hashem to depart from the hearts of men – that of the drinkers and revelers at houses of drink. The end of this joy is sorrow, for many ills result from the frivolity of drinking… For wine causes one to be a scoffer and to shout and to be contentious, and all who go astray through it will not grow in wisdom…” On the other hand, “Drinking wine, however, is very good when it is done properly in the manner of the wise… All of this teaches us the benefits of wine when it is drunk in moderation in the manner of the wise, in which case the mind rules over the wine and not the wine over the mind, who drink at set times with friend and acquaintances and with the saintly and the righteous, and not with brutes, and empty-headed people. For wine will increase the wisdom of the deep… The folly of the fool it multiplies… It stirs the hatred of the foe. It makes the giver impart more and closes the miser’s heart more. This is how wine should be used: one should use it as a cure for his sorrow, in order to strengthen himself in Torah by learning with joy, for when one is steeped in sorrow he cannot learn… It is to these ends, then, that the wise man should drink wine, taking care not to drink so much as to be compelled to cancel his work, and his affairs, and above all, not to drink so much as to be incapacitated for Torah study, or for prayers, or to be brought to excessive laughter and lightheadedness. And he should not drink to the point of losing his possessions or quarreling with his friends or breaking vessels or revealing his secrets or those of others… the implication being that we have been commanded to attain only that joy which is conducive to the service of the Creator Of All, and it is impossible to serve the Blessed One out of lightheadedness, laughter, or drunkenness.” (See there in its entirety.)
We see from here that wine can in fact be very positive, as we know it is also used for very holy occasions, like kiddush and havdala. But it can also be very destructive as well; and therefore the Ralbag advises to stay far away from it. Noach, with all his great and positive intent and his perfection in character for the Torah testifies about him, “Noah was a righteous man, perfect in his generation; Noah walked with G-D” (Breishis 6:9), still in all he stumbled and crashed in drunkenness. So why does Hashem permit it?

 It must be that though Hashem did make some things absolutely forbidden, like pig, shellfish, etc. But other things, that might be very devastating, He kept permissible as a test, to see that we use it precisely in the right manner, which is very hard and risky. But this is one example of our job in life, to meet the perfect median in doing things which are in service of Hashem. Though that is also why the Ralbag advises staying far away from it, since the risks are extremely high.
The Torah in general gives similar advice: “I call Heaven and Earth today to bear witness against you: I have placed life and death before you, blessing and curse; and you shall choose life, so that you will live, you and your offspring. To love Hashem, your G-D, to listen to His voice and to cleave to Him…” (Devarim 30:19′ 20). Hashem created man with free will, the ability to choose between good and evil; but he advises us to choose good. This is our purpose in life, to make proper decisions. The general rule of thumb is to err on the side of caution, but the proper approach ultimately is to find a fitting middle ground, which is the success of serving Hashem.

Chodesh tov and good Shabbos,