We can’t be duped into believing that lashon hara is believable just because it was said in a group or in front of the victim’s face, or if a person claims he would say it in the victim’s face. This gain of trust is the trick of trust is the trick of the yetzer hara, evil inclination because why should the speaker of lashon hara be more trusted and believed just because it seems like it makes sense since why would he stick out his neck and claim something in a group or in the guy’s face if it is not true, but on the other hand this guy being talked about was assumed to be a good upstanding, trusted character until now so how can we decide he isn’t just based on word of mouth of someone else. Even testimony of one witness in court, which is a stronger reason to trust his word is only believable to cause the litigant to swear for some monetary matters, nothing more than that. You are only allowed to be concerned and investigate the matter there is no reason to believe what is heard no matter how believable it sounds and seems to be until you investigate and know for sure it is true. Even if the person who says it can make an excuse that of course what I am saying must be true because why would I say it to his face or in a crowd, even though that isn’t a good excuse to speak lashon hara but it is certainly not a good excuse to accept lashon hara because the people listening still don’t really know if it is true or not.
Vayigash – Career of the Righteous
After Yosef revealed himself to his brothers, he brought them down with their father and rest of the family to sojourn in Egypt, specifically in the land of Goshen. “Yosef said to his brothers and to his father’s household, ‘I will go up and tell Pharaoh, and I will say to him, my brothers and my father’s household who were in the land of Canaan have come to me. The men are shepherds, for they were [always] owners of livestock, and their flocks and their cattle and all they have they have brought’” (Breishis 46:31, 32).
Why were the brothers shepherds and why does it seem that many of the major Jewish leaders throughout Tanach were shepherds at some point in time?
Rabbeinu Bachye enlightens us with a fascinating answer. He begins by saying that Yosef was emphasizing that the brothers were shepherds of their own flock so that it would not be misunderstood and thought that they tended others’ sheep, being in the business of investments. That is why Yosef added: “for they were [always] owners of livestock;” to inform everyone that the sheep did not belong to others, but were their own, for they were very wealthy. The reason why the brothers chose this profession, which was also the profession of their forefathers, was twofold:
- There was tremendous profit in wool, milk, and offspring. It also doesn’t require a lot of great toil, and is without sin. About this King Shlomo said, “Know well the condition of your flocks; give your attention to the herds” (Mishlei 27:23).
- The brothers knew that they and their offspring would be exiled to Egypt and because the Egyptians worshiped the form of a sheep, the brothers therefore took upon this profession so that their descendants would accustom themselves to it and the worshiping of sheep would be foreign to them.
We also find that most of the righteous and prophets were shepherds. We find by Hevel, “Behold Hevel was a shepherd of sheep” (Breishis 4:2). So too Moshe: “And Moshe was a shepherd” (Shemos 3:1). So was the prophet Shmuel, as well as King Shaul, and King Dovid; they were all shepherds. The reason they chose to be shepherds were in order to stay away from populated areas since many sins stem from being among people. For example: lashon hara and rechilus (slander and gossiping), swearing falsely, inappropriate relationships, stealing, and extortion. The more one stays away from people, the easier he escapes the trap of sin. (Click here for Hebrew text.)
It would seem that besides being an easy and affluent job, being a shepherd seems to be an honest job that can keep one out of trouble. The brothers had the impeccable idea and deep insight into human dynamic that by going into this profession they would create a habit inside their family of treating sheep as mere animals that can be controlled and manipulated for business purposes. By accustoming themselves to treating them as their own flock, which is guided by them, it created a sense of reality which made it virtually impossible for their descendants to be lured into the idolatrous tendencies of the Egyptians that viewed sheep as gods.
It would also seem that other righteous people and prophets used this profession to create a habit in order to distance oneself from sin, for it surely wasn’t something that they did their entire lives. For Moshe Rabbeinu, the prophet Shmuel, King Shaul, and King Dovid weren’t shepherds, away from civilization, their entire lives since each of them was a leader in their generation! It would seem that by just going into this profession, it puts one in a position to avoid all these sins, as it will accustom a person to stay distant from those sins even when they are forced to go into public office and handle a wide array of people. Those years of being a shepherd built up the fortitude and habit in each one of them to appreciate and imbibe the sense to stay away from those sins so that when they came into the public spotlight, they were sensitive to these issues and knew how to act accordingly for the most part.
We see from here how important it is to choose a clean and honest profession because it can make such an impact on a person which will create habits and have ramifications on how he and even his future descendants will act, and G-D forbid the opposite could be true as well, that choosing a dishonest and sleezy profession might have a very negative impact on you and your family.
Torah Riddles Test #161
2. Question: Whether it is on a Torah level or Rabbinic level why is it absolutely permitted to nullify a prohibition by accident though on purpose it is forbidden since either way it is inevitable (psik reisha) that it is nullified and a psik reisha is forbidden even if done without intent?
Background:
A. The issue with nullifying a prohibition is not taking the prohibition seriously.
Answer: If not taking the prohibition seriously is the problem then if you nullify it by accident then the problem doesn’t apply even if the results are inevitable since the intent was never to make light of the prohibition.
Torah Riddles Test #160
1. Question: Why is it forbidden to stoke the coals under the fire of a pot of food that belongs to a non-Jew lest it might have meat and milk mixed in the walls of the pot which you would inadvertently be cooking but you are able to close a chest on Shabbos which might have flies in it and inadvertently trap them on Shabbos which is normally forbidden?
Background:
A. Rebbe Akiva Aiger on the Rema in Yoreh Deah 87:6 says that though normally doing something without intent is permissible but that’s only if there is a doubt of whether something will go wrong in the future but in this case the doubt of whether there is meat and milk mixed in the walls of the pot is a question of what happened in the past so if the mixture of meat and milk is there then it is inevitable (psik reisha) that a prohibition of cooking meat and milk together would happen.
B. However, the same holds true for the flies in the chest. If they are there, then it happened already, so it is inevitable that if you lock the chest on Shabbos you will be trapping them, though that is not your intent.
C. Shabbos requires a meleches machsheves, and act of craftmanship, or thought put into it, in order for it to be prohibited.
Answer: If one does not know whether the flies are really in the chest or not then he is lacking meleches machsheves, so even if it is a psik reisha, inevitable, that if the flies would be there, they would be trapped but since you don’t know if they are there and all you are doing is locking the chest then you really aren’t trapping. But whether you intend to cook milk and meat or not by stoking the coals, it is a psik reisha that forbidden cooking would happen if the prohibition is therefore you can’t do it.
Miketz – Unanimous Leadership
This year is very unique! It is rare that Shabbos Chanukah does not land on the Torah portion of Miketz and we don’t need to read the special haftorah for Chanukah. This week’s haftorah is taken from Melachim Alef and is the famous story of King Shlomo, the two women who laid claim to the baby and his advice to split the baby in half. This took place the next day after he woke up from his dream (which is a connection to the Torah portion where Pharaoh had his dreams of plenty and famine), where Hashem promised him He would grant him anything he asked for. King Shlomo asked for wisdom in order to judge right from wrong. Hashem granted him intellect and wisdom to which there was no other, and there will never be another like it in the future.
The next day King Shlomo’s first test occurred when two ladies came into his court, each one claiming they were the mother of the living baby, and that the other’s baby had passed away. “And the king said, ‘Fetch me a sword.’ And they brought a sword before the king. And the king said, ‘Divide the living child in two, and give half to one, and half to the other.’ And the woman whose son (was) the live one, said to the king, for her compassion was aroused for her son, and she said, ‘O my lord, give her the living child, and by no means slay him.’ But the other said, ‘Let it be neither mine nor yours, divide (it).’ And the king answered and said, ‘Give her the living child, and by no means slay him: she (is) his mother.’ And all Israel heard of the judgment which the king had judged; and they feared the king; for they saw that the wisdom of God (was) in him to do judgment” (Melachim Alef 3:24-28).
The Yalkut Shimone says “in the name of Rebbe Shmuel bar Nachmani that King Shlomo’s lips started moving with wisdom and he said that Hashem really wanted this case to one day occur and that is why He created man in pairs, two eyes, two ears, two nostrils, two hands, and two legs. He began to decree that the child should be cut in half… when his advisors saw what was happening, they said, ‘Woe to you, O land whose king is a lad’ (Koheles 10:16), if he would not be a lad (between the age of 12-13 at the time) he would not have done this. When he said, ‘Give her the living child, and by no means slay him,’ they started to say, ‘Fortunate are you, O land, whose king is the son of nobles’ (Koheles 10:17).” (Click here for Hebrew text.)
The Haftorah concludes with the very next pasuk, “And King Shlomo was king over all Israel” (Melachim Alef 4:1). The Radak says that when the nation heard the judgement the king had judged they were afraid to do anything wrong even in secret for they saw that with all his wisdom justice will come out just as what happened in this case. The reason why this pasuk states the obvious that King Shlomo was king over all of Israel is because Dovid, his father, did not rule over all of Israel at the beginning of his reign, therefore the pasuk says here that Shlomo ruled over all of Israel, no one questioned his reign since they saw the wisdom of Elokim (G-D) within him to exact proper judgement. (Click here for Hebrew text.)
What made King Shlomo more convincing than his father, King Dovid, to be accepted by all from the onset of his reign? King Dovid was appointed by Hashem through the prophet Shmuel, and surely he had Divine Revelation, Ruach HaKodesh, for Chaza”l say King Dovid’s whole work of Tehillim (Psalms) was written with Ruach HaKodesh. Furthermore, King Dovid proved to be a brave and powerful ruler who defended his country against the onslaught of any enemy like when he killed the giant, Goliath, and victoriously battling the Plishtim. So why wasn’t he instantaneously accepted as king over Israel but his son, Shlomo, who was perceived, at least from the outside, as being appointed king by his father, not directly by Hashem, though it was in fact by Divine appointment, he was still pretty much immediately accepted by the entire nation?
The Radak is telling us that though G-D sent the prophet Shmuel to anoint King Dovid as king, King Dovid was a mighty warrior, who protected the nation from the enemy, and he even had Ruach HaKodesh, Divine Revelation. But even so, to be immediately accepted by everyone, the nation expects the king to rule by Divine wisdom, and because King Shlomo was able to prove that he could lead the people and enforce proper judgement using what people could perceive as being wisdom directly from Hashem, he was therefore unanimously accepted as the king of Israel.
In a similar vein we find in this week’s Torah portion that Yosef was accepted by Pharaoh and all of Egypt as Second in Command over the entire country because he proved he had Divine wisdom by interpreting Pharaohs dreams in a way which seemed palpable, to the degree that the Ramban says that Pharaoh and his advisors felt as if the dreams were already fulfilled. The Radak there says that Yosef suggested to Pharaoh that he should appoint a wise and insightful person over Egypt, and Pharaoh appointed him because his wisdom was greater than all of the magicians and advisor. This must have been, as Pharaoh attested, because of the Spirit of the Lord, Ruach Elokim, which Yosef possessed. Pharaoh therefore gave Yosef the leadership in order to lead according to his intellect. (Click here for Hebrew text.)
We see from here that people are able to detect when a person has Divine Wisdom that he uses for the betterment of the country. Everyone will be completely accepting to immediately subjugate themselves and trust the person who possesses and uses this type of intellect as their leader with unwavering awe and dedication. This defines a leader with unanimous leadership!
Sefer Chofetz Chaim chapter 6, halacha 11 cont. and halacha 12
The Chofetz Chaim says in halacha 11 that the extent of not accepting lashon hara is that you can’t hate them in your heart even if you hear one witness testify in court. That can only enforce a vow in court but no one can believe the claim against someone even in court. Certainly, to no pay up any obligation because of the rumors you heard is absolutely forbidden, for example if there are rumors that a bodyguard for an important person stole thousands of dollars that does not mean he should stop getting a salary. He must be paid until an investigation proves he’s guilty. It doesn’t make a difference how small or big of a sin the rumors speak about whether it’s incest, murder or anything else, you can only be concerned and investigate to seek out the truth while taking proper defensive action but you can’t hold anything in your heart against the person. The Chofetz Chaim in a footnote point out a prevalent problem that occurred in his day and might even continue even today where there are people in the community who are known to be poor and are supported by tzedaka. If someone spreads rumors that they are really doing this as an act just to shnoor from others but they don’t really need the money that does not mean anyone can just give less them what they normally give until it’s proven that the allegations are correct. Until then he has an assumption of being poor and just as we don’t require any stranger who asks for money to prove he needs it so to this person who we assumed until now need financial help should not be denied just based on rumors.
The Chofetz Chaim concludes the 6th chapter in halacha 12 by saying that if anyone did accept lashon hara as truth then he must put in all his effort to change his mind and once he does that then it’s as if he never sinned, just as when a thief returns what he stole it’s as if he didn’t steal. Of course he must admit his wrong doing, video, and accept upon himself to never do it again like any other sin that require the proper repentance process. This is all that has to be done if he just accepted what he hears and didn’t tell anyone but if he told others then he must either ask forgiveness from whom he spoke about or (which might be a better choice, according to Rav Yisrael Salanter in order to not make the person feel bad when he finds out lashon hara was spoken about him) he should convince those he spoke to that what he said was false.
Torah Riddles Test #159
2. Question: If the Shulchan Aruch (Orach Chaim 673:2) says that the lighting if the Chanukah lights is what does the mitzvah then why do you have to relight without a blessing if you blew it out on purpose though you don’t have to relight at all if you blew it out by accident and certainly if it went out itself?
Background:
A. The Mishna Berura (25) adds that if you lit it in a place which will automatically go out like in a windy area then you should relight it in a proper area (that can potentially allow it to stay lit for 30 minutes.)
B. The Mishna Berura (26) says that even on eve Shabbos if it blew out before sunset you technically still don’t have to relight because the rabbis enacted the mitzvah to be done with a blessing in a fashion that the mitzvah would start before sunset though on all other days it should be lit afterwards.
Answer: The Avnei Nezer says that since he lit with proper intent then blowing it out by accident, without intent can’t nullify the lighting that was done with proper intent. But when blowing out on purpose and with intent then you are nullifying the act of lighting. Rav Moshe Feinstein explains that since you blew it out on purpose the one seeing that will say it was originally lit for his own personal need, why else would he blow it out. It’s the samething as lighting outside and the bringing the menorah inside where the Mishna Berura (675:1:5) says you don’t fulfill your mitzvah because people will say you lit for your own need, not for the sake if the mitzvah. (See Dirshu Mishna Berura 673:3 note 40)
Torah Riddles Test #158
1. Question: Why can’t the shamash on a menorah which is less than ten tefachim which is about 35 inches from the ground be lower than the rest of the lights?
Background:
A. The shamash is used to light the Chanukah lights and is the extra candle to benefit from because you can’t get benefit from the Chanukah lights which are set aside to remind us of the miracle.
B. The shamash can be higher, lower, set apart or in front or in back of the rest, anything to show that it’s not part of the mitzvah lights.
Answer: Below ten tefachim is so low that it’s not really usable as light so it can’t be used as a shamash. (See Dirshu Mishna Berura 673:1:20:25)
Sefer Chofetz Chaim chapter 6, halacha 11, footnote 30
The Chofetz Chaim says there are many details defining what being concerned over lashon hara might mean which will be discussed in more detail in the last chapter, but the general rule is that you can take proper precautions to defend yourself or others but under no means are you allowed to take any actions against him, whether physically hurt the potential threat or disgrace and embarrass him in any way as long as it is unclarified.
The Chofetz Chaim brings down a responsa from the Mahari”k (chapter 188) which is a live illustration of going beyond being concerned. There a story a poor old Jew named Reb Aharon Ruskia who a woman spread rumors that he was adulterous with her and people ran him out of town by publicly embarrassing him and not even allowing him to get an aliyah in shul. When the Mahari”k heard about this he was furious and said it’s a great sin to believe this cursed woman! A person who embarrasses and denigrates a descendant of Avraham, Yitzchak, and Yaakov, treating him lightly in your eyes, is considered disgusting in the “eyes” of Hashem and will be greatly punished! There is no worse embarrassment then what was done to Reb Aharon, the way he was treated by not giving him an aliyah. Furthermore, the Gemara in Bava Metzia 58b proves from the episode of King Dovid and Batsheva, when Doeg and Achitofel tried talking out and embarrassing King Dovid in public, that embarrassing someone in public is worse than adultery. For King Dovid said, even if I was adulterous (which he wasn’t) then that deserves the capital punishment of strangulation but still he would a get a share in the World to Come but one who embarrasses another in public has no share in the World to Come (if he doesn’t repent before he dies.) Therefore, you have to be very careful and thoroughly check out the matter before you come to conclusions that a person did a wrongdoing which deserves such severe punishment like public excommunication.
Being concerned for what you heard does not mean to be on the offensive and taking action against the would-be perpetrator, it only means to be on the defensive. One must be very carefully when telling others of a possible threat to be sure they will just listen and take precautions on the defensive because if you see they will go on the offensive then you cannot warn then since the whole reason you are allowed to warn then is because of the verse “Love your neighbor as yourself” just as you would not want any harm done to yourself then you should inform others who might be in harm’s way. However, if you know the people you will tell will go on the offensive and hurt or embarrass the would-be offender then why should his blood be any redder than their blood and the mitzvah of “Love your neighbor as yourself” will apply to the possible offender because he might be a threat to others, but they are definitely going to be a threat to him so it’s better. It to tell them anything.
Bottom line you can only be concerned about lashon hara you heard to be on the defensive but not to act on the offensive.
Chanukah – Lights of Joy
In honor of the upcoming shloshim of Rebbitzin Evelyn Yachnes, Chana Chaya bas Chaim A”H. Sponsored by some family members who would like to sponsor the insightful divrei Torah of Rabbi Dovid Shmuel Milder. It is extremely appropriate that this venue should be a zechus for our mother whose ideals are closely connected to the lessons and mussar that Rabbi Milder expresses so well. Thank you so much for this opportunity.
“What is Chanukkah? That [which] our Sages taught: On the 25th of Kislev – the days of Chanukah, they are eight, not to eulogize on them and not to fast on them, for when the Greeks entered the Temple, they polluted all the oils in the Temple, and when the Chashmonaim dynasty overcame and defeated them, they checked and they found but one cruse of oil that was set in place with the seal of the High Priest, but there was only [enough] to light a single day. A miracle was done with it, and they lit from it for eight days. The following year [the Sages] fix those [days], making them holidays for praise and thanksgiving” (Gemara Shabbos 21b).
When the Greeks entered the Beis Hamikdash they seemed to have defiled everything inside, including all the utensils used to prepare and process the sacrifices, as well as the Shulchan, etc. Chazal even say the Greeks sacrificed a pig on the Holy Alter. Why then does the gemara emphasize the oil and menorah?
Chanukah literally means dedication. This holiday specifically celebrates the rededication of the Second Beis HaMikdash in the times of the Chashmonaim after they recaptured it from the Greeks.
There were actually seven dedications recorded in Jewish History. The medrish Pesiksa Rabasi DiRav Kahana states, “How many Chanukahs are there? There are 7 Chanukahs. They are:
- The dedication of the heaven and earth, as it says, ‘Thus the heaven and earth were finished’ (Breishis 2:1). What chanukah was then? ‘And G-D set them in the firmament of heaven to give light’ (Breishis 1:17).
- The dedication of the wall, as it says, ‘And at the dedication of the wall of Yerushalayim’ (Nechemiah 12:27).
- The dedication of the exiles [when they rebuilt the second Beis HaMikdash], as it says, ‘And they offered up for the dedication of this House of God’ (Ezra 6:17).
- The dedication of the kohanim where we light [the Chanukiah].
- The dedication in the World to Come as it says, ‘I will search Yerushalayim with candles’ (Tzephania 1:12).
- The dedication [of the Mishkan] by the princes [of each tribe], as it says, ‘This is the dedication of the alter’ (Bamidbar 6:84).
- The dedication of [the first] Beis HaMikdash, that which is referred to in Tehillim ‘A Psalm – a song for the dedication of the Temple – by Dovid’ (Tehillim 30:1), (Psiksa Rabasi DiRav Kahana, Piska DiChanukah, paragraph 2).”
The Pesiksa DiRav Kahana repeats this list but in a different order, at the end of the chapter in paragraph seven. The order is chronological, ending with the dedication in The World to Come which will come at the end of days. The Maharz”u says that the medrish repeats the list in order to end off the chapter with words of blessing, as it says, “And the dedication of the World to Come which it will also have candles as it is written, ‘And the light of the moon shall be like the light of the sun, and the light of the sun shall be sevenfold’ (Yeshayahu 30:26).”
The Rada”l, Rav Dovid Luria zt”l, has his explanation of the repetition of the list. He says that at first the purpose of the list was to show the 7 times the word chanukah, dedication, was used. It is just that by the creation of the world, and what will happen in the World to Come, the word chanukah is not used, but since there were and will be candles, that is enough because they are normally lit for the joy of light of the dedication. Then the list is repeated to emphasize that each dedication had lights and candles, including the dedication of creation which had the celestial lights – the sun, moon, and stars. There was also a special light throughout the seven days of creation shining for the joy of dedication. The dedication of the Mishkan by Moshe Rabbeinu and the dedication of the first Beis HaMikdash by King Shlomo (as well as the second Beis HaMikdash) had the lighting of the menorah. By the dedication of the wall around Yerushalayim it states, “To perform the dedication with joy” (Nechemiah 12:27), referring to candles for joy as it says, “It was light and joy.” The paragraph concludes with the Chanukah of the Chashmonaim which was with candles and the dedication in the World to Come which will be with candles. (Click here and here for Hebrew sources.)
We see from here that, by definition, a proper dedication must be done with candles or a controlled light substance like the sun, moon and stars. Hence, Chanukah, the rededication of the Beis HaMikdash after it was defiled by the Greeks, is commemorated with lights, for that is what is most important in a dedication. For this reason, it would seem, it was worthwhile for Hashem to make a miracle to ensure the dedication takes place properly and with the utmost joy.
Why are lights so important for a dedication? It would seem from here that light has the inherent value of bringing joy. It is known that the ability to see clearly with proper lighting makes people feel more comfortable and happier. In places where it is cloudy and gloomy, or the sun does not come up for parts of the year, it is known that people there are more prone to depression and sadness. In fact, the Shulchan Aruch says that one who cannot afford to buy both Chanukah and Shabbos candles should buy Shabbos candles for the sake of peace the house. The Mishna Berura adds that nowadays, when we light our candles inside the house, it is better to buy a candle for Chanukah, because you won’t be sitting in the dark, and even though you are not supposed to benefit from the Chanukah light, it is considered a time of danger nowadays and the candle can be lit for Chanukah on the table inside, though one will inevitably gain benefit from it. However, most poskim hold one should not differentiate between the times of the gemara and today so even nowadays if one can only afford one candle it should be for Shabbos(Mishna Berura 678:1:2).
Light sheds piece of mind and happiness to all within its arc. It is most appropriate to have a beginning or even a reopening with lights in order to start with a sense of joy. Thus, Chanukah had to commemorate the miracle of lights because there is no inauguration without lights. Chanukah celebrates that feeling of joy, magnified by Hashem’s miracle, which was radiating from the lights.
May we feel a sense of renewed happiness in our lives this Chanukah!